Not Lecturing You

I'm not lecturing you. You weren't and haven't been faithful. Its not a lecture. Tell the whole truth about who I am to anyone in your life and ask them if you're faithful. I'm not lecturing you. Its the simple truth.

I never said I have no interest about your child. In fact I said that I would be here for you and help you and support you and that I would care about your child as much as I care about you.

And when did you ask? When did you ever stop and say, wow, this must suck for you. How are you? Do you have questions? Do you want to talk about all of this? I did. In fact, I have been trying to talk to you for weeks. I have been so persistent about keeping our plans specifically so we could sit down and talk about all of this. I have a million questions. But I can't talk to you. Every time I even try to voice my feelings or talk about anything other than the weather or sports you have gotten so pissy with me and its caused me to freak out. And then all of the bullsh*t starts.

I'm sorry but this isn't easy for me. I have been b*tched slapped how many times now? But b/c I truly believed there was something more here, something good, I stayed and took it and dealt with it, the best way I know how.

But you fail to realize that. You fail to realize that yet again you have pushed me completely aside.

If you care about me, then do something.

Nobody deserves this and I'm not going to just let this pass.