Hurting Mr. Big

I'm in such an ugly place right now. 

For someone I supposedly love and care about, all I want to do is hurt him. 

I want everyone to know what a liar he is.  I want everyone to know that he isn't being faithful and that he's playing EVERYONE right now.

And I can't figure out if this is just my own hurt and I want revenge or if maybe I'm finally starting to get over him and all of this and I don't care what his perception of me is.   

I know that if I tell the truth, he will no longer be a part of my life.  But I keep asking myself if I really care...